Help! What do I do?

Keep going to counseling. Also, do little things for her like taking her to dinner, writing/texting love notes to her, buy her favorite candy, do the dishes, bathe the kids, wash her car, kiss her when you leave, tell her how much you need and love her, anything that will show her that you are putting her needs first. You have to work hard at erasing your behavior of the last 10 yrs. but you can do it if you really want your marriage to work. Be patient. She is not going to give in easily. Keep on working on your issues and she will see the change and come around. The reason you are lonely and depressed is you are focusing on the problem. Focus on a solution. Do you have a hobby or activity you like to play. Get involved with your church or join a sporting team (bowling, softball, etc.) This will show her that you are making changes in your life.

I think that the friend is coming between you two as well but the biggest problem is your wife. If you are doing everything to try to correct the problem and she is not responsive that is going to be an issue. I also think that you both should go to therapy. If you wife is not going to at least try and give the relationship a chance it's not going to work. She needs to get off that phone and spend some quality time with you. It's okay to have a girlfriend to talk to, but your husband should come first. Talk to her about how you feel and tell her that you would like to spend some more time with her. Make plans to do romantic things that will get her out the house and away from the phone. I wiosh you the best of luck!!

It amazes me the level of control and "authority" you have given your wife in this relationship! Stop acting like a tail-wagging puppy dog and get some confidence. The success and health of the relationship does not depend on one single person alone. You say you've been trying to change - which is great, but from what you describe it sounds as though your wife isn't being a good partner to you, either. In fact, it seems pretty manipulative and demeaning.

The two of you should attend councelling together. You both need to work on putting the past in the past and building a relationship - a PARTNERSHIP - on reciprocal trust, concern, affection, and friendship. This is not something you can do on your own as it takes two to make any relationship work, and while I'm sure you love her very much, I highly doubt that your wife is perfect.

Good luck!

If your wife has been saying for the last 10 years or showing that she is not getting enough affection then be glad she didn't find a boyfriend to do what you haven't been doing. Its sad that you now get jealous of your wife's girlfriend who apparently show her more attention than you did. She has every right to be pissed when she wanted your attention you didn't show it. Be glad that she is giving you another chance, now run with it. If it takes you wining and dining her do it, keep the romance going and show her she is number one to you and you appreciate another chance....tell her how beautiful she is....if you love this woman show her affection like she has never seen!!! Good luck

well, for starters, when you are affectionate you cannot do it once and hope for the best. you have to start when the both of you get up in the morning and throughout the day, even when she is at work. get her cards and slip into her purse, cook for her, just walk up to her and hug her and hold her hand when you are out in public, when you are at home and watching tv, sit next to her and rub her feet or massage her arm (something that small counts), alittle goes a long way, i hope some of these ideas work - good luck

Offer her a back massage, foot rub, or head massage if she's into that. Spoil her with things that you haven't done before, but that don't cost much. Take her out to a museum, zoo, a picnic with champagne or wine. Pick up a treat or a snack of her favorite when you come home from work.

Why dont you plan a romantic date? Take her out, do it by surprise, leave petals by the bed, you can get the fake ones at Walmart in the craft section, turn the phones off...order out, or bring home something, have chocolate, and wine or something like that there too, keeps the lights off with candles, tell her you love her.

just be affectionate everyday, let her know that you love her. send her flowers, leave little notes for her to have a good day or something like that where you know she'll find them, make it a point to take her out at least once a week, or cuddle on the couch for a movie, just the two of you.......good luck!!

Sounds like you have some years of affection to make up. Has she told you some of the things she would like you to do? Try flowers, candles, cuddling, going to the movies, out for walks or just listen when she talks.

Keep trying, I think there’s more to the story then that. Find out what else she upset about.