Torn between my heart and mind?

I am 32 years old, been married to the same woman for the past nine years and we have two beautiful children together...8 and 6. The past 4 years have been very down, very hurtful, with very little if any marital bliss. I have been called ugly, hideous...no other woman would ever want you. My wife would tell me she's the only one that would even give me the time of day. I have been feeling a sense of void and emptiness in the space that once was filled with what I hoped was sincere love from my wife who I loved dearly. Within the past month I crossed paths with a wonderful woman in a moment of fate that I can not ignore. Neither one of us were "looking" for anyone, we didn't "hook up" at a club or a bar. We just literally crossed paths. Now, my wife has been trying deseratley to change her ways of hurting me but I can't get over the feelings of this new woman. This is a feeling I have never in my entire life have ever experienced. Its a feeling a a true connection. I've had "new" relationships and I know what tjhe "new" feeling is like and this is different. I've been hurt and programmed to think I'm no good and now someone has come into my life who can't stop smiling when she's with me. What do I do......I don't want to make the wrong decision and regret it for the rest of my life. Do I stay with my wife who has done this to me the past 4 years and now at the drop of a hat is deciding to change for the better or do I pursue what I feel is making me happy inside. Help!! A family is depending on this.