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Lycann
Lv 6
Lycann asked in SportsMartial Arts · 1 decade ago

Martial Arts Friends?

Kind of an ambiguous title but it should draw some attention.

Since I began my training I've become close friends a few fellow students. This seems to be more than a likely occurrence given the time you spend with your training partners and your common interest in martial arts.

Despite this, I haven't done anything with my martial arts friends outside of class. I'll send an email but that's the limit of it.

Is this common to have friends you train with but never do anything outside of class? I realize that a lot of people compartmentalize their daily life and their martial arts training and keep the two separate but this question is to just find out what other people here have experienced along these lines.

Update:

Last night after class we were all just talking and someone suggested we all go out for a beer after class sometime. Everyone just leaped on that idea like either they'd never thought about or never managed to actually ask whether anyone was interested in that.

I personally don't do much outside of training and work at all so I hadn't really considered it. It's a good idea but I find it amusing how I've been friends with these people for years and not once considered to ask whether they wanted to meet up for something outside of class.

10 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    i dont, the only time i really see them is in my class, or otherwise bumping into them on the street and just sayinf hi and ect.

    however there arn't any that are my age so i suppose my circumstance is slightly different

  • j
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Someone whos seriously training might not want to drink. So a beer when they're following a strict nutrition program might be not be their idea of fun.

    Could possibly be that they don't have much free time. The little that they get, they spend at places like martial arts classes.

    I have friends in college, but we're in the same class for 5 hours a day. They meet outside of college all the time, but i never join them. It's just that i see them so much, i don't want to spend any more time with them. I'd rather do something with someone i don't meet as often. Your martial arts friends could be the same way i am. They see you enough during class, they'd rather spend their time with some of their other friends from work/school/college.

    Another theory is that they aren't actually your friends. When your constantly hitting somone you feel close to them for some reason. Its happened to me. If it weren't for the class and you having so much fun dishing out and taking punishment, you might not like them. You might not have been friends if you had just met on the street,

  • 1 decade ago

    I've belonged to a few martial arts schools, I've never made any real friends there. I could tolerate most of the people, but there was always a couple I couldn't stand to work with. Once a veteran instructor even had the nerve to say if you don't have a life, don't try to get one here. He also said that people that just thought they could be buddies with him would be very disappointed, as that would never happen. I understood some of what he was saying because you can't create a situation of being friends with a student that could end up being a conflict of interest. I train by myself now and with family members, I got tired of being forced into going to tournaments , buy thier books & instruction dvd's ,

    Source(s): 25 yrs in & out of martial arts
  • 1 decade ago

    I lived in our Dojo. It was in my home.

    We were also very close. Sensei emphasized that we were a family and always helped each other through hard times.

    We celebrated all birthdays, promotions and such in my house so there was always cake and food. I was the official cook - "Chop-Chop" is what I was so affectionately called.

    The camaraderie was great and we could go at it without having any animosity. The rule was - "if you are not part of the family, there is the door". It is a rule I carried on into my "house".

    When I taught at the Y, I had all the kids form a circle. I called it the "Powwow". I asked them about how they felt during the class, what they learned, etc. After dismissing the class, I called "group hug!" and they all came together in a big hug.

    The parents loved that. I just wanted to foster a sense of brotherhood and I did not tolerate anything less.

    That helped the overall attitude among the kids.

    I miss those days.

  • I know what you mean man its weird like a serious devoted martial artist usually practices every time he can which is usually after work or before work. My social life outside of work has for the most part been completely gone since I started my obsession with martial arts. Unlike most people who go on dates hang out with friends family etc all I do is basically work and do martial arts everysingle day of the week. My training comrades are pretty much are the only friends I have now adays. We usually dont hang out really its like when we hang out outside of class its usually because were practicing martial arts or doing something that has to do with martial arts we do go out and eat after training alot and even then when were talking and socializing its usually about martial arts. If you want a normal life with friends girlfriends family etc then I do not recommend that you become obsessed in martial arts because it does control your life. If you truely do want to be great at a martial art and still want a social life then your friends must be martial artists you girlfriendsmust be martial artists your family memebers must be martial artists etc because any of the above people who are not martial artists you will usually have very little to do with them in your overall life...

  • 1 decade ago

    I have friends in class that I don't do anything really outside of class.. I had one friend like that and then after a year or so we finally went over to each others house and now we're like best friends inside and outside of the Dojang.

    It's your preference really, if you want to see them outside of class then just ask them for their number. If not then do nothing.

    Source(s): Eight years of Taekwondo 2nd Degree Black Belt
  • 1 decade ago

    It is fairly common, and some schools have differnet kinds of a social feel to them. My school regularly goes out after class to a resteraunt, and often has parties and BBQs at the house (where most of the residents are MA practitioners)

    So its not uncommon to have a seperate life out side of MA class but it can be mixed also.

  • 1 decade ago

    I know one or two people outside of class, but I don't really like being around them that much. This is because of their attitude, how they talk about martial arts out of class, and their values. The other people I talk to I don't really know out of class. Thanks for giving me the idea, I will probably ask them what they think of it.

  • Depends really.

    I'm good friends outside my class but inside it we're bitter rivals. Some are the other way round.

  • 1 decade ago

    I have friends in class, that I hang out with in the real world as well.

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