How do I handle the stress I'm feeling about letting my spouse back into my life?

Listen to your gut and do not ignore your instincts!

Panic attacks are a way your body has of telling you you are NOT ready to be near him yet. So are migraines, backaches, stomach problems, ulcers and rashes.

While I think it's good that you are going to counseling, only you know how you feel and only you will know what is best for you.

Your therapist might recommend you to "let go of your anger and not blame him" so you can be happy with your husband; but the truth is that everybody is different -and we all have different levels of tolerance.

What may be "forgivable" for one person may be "unforgivable" for another one, so don't let anyone pressure you into accepting a situation you neither want (at least not now) nor think you can handle!

I truly believe we are a perfect machine. Body, emotions and thoughts are all interconnected. So when we have a big problem of an emotional nature, and our mind decides to "work things out" but our body sends out signals, then it's time to sit down and analyze things very well!

TAKE YOUR TIME. Do what feels right to you. I'ts your life, your happiness and your health we are talking about here!

Good luck.

Ok, one way to look at this? Think of it as an illness. If this was cancer, you would ignore the noise, and get it treated. You would tell yourself it takes time and patience. You don't allow yourself to get angry, bitter or throw a pitty party. You deal with it head on. This is no different except the patient is you and your husband, depression. Keep in mind, The cooler you remain, the more focused you stay, the easier it will be. If you get mad, write in a journal. Its amazing how theraputic that is. Depression is an illness, so is alcoholism. You treat those issues the same way, cool headed, with focus and tuning out the noise. The noise in this case is your anger and resentment. You don't want to get caught up in his anger and he should not get caught up in yours. They call this the dance of anger. Books have been written about it. You married each other for a reason. Go back to what that was, remind yourself of who he was, and why you fell in love with him. Like a mantra, replay it over and over. You both have lots to lose if you give up now. You stay together for good and bad. What comes of it when you hang tough, is a better marriage, a stronger bond. That is the prize, and what your focus should be.

If he has depression, you need to research and understand illness. It is very important that you do this or forget it. It is very difficult for him as well. Don't put yourself in situations where there is drinking and don't buy alcohol. Find an activity to do and get busy , together if you can. Depression drugs don't work right away, it may take a few months. You probably need to understand why you are so angry and why you found each other. Depressed folks seem to mate with other depressed folks. So, maybe some work on yourself is job 1 and let him deal with his issues.

Well, your counselor is exactly right. If you cannot do things that are difficult, well, hand over your driver's license, and move back to your parent's house, where you can live like a little kid for as long as you want to only do things that are easy.

Hes in therapy. Hes getting medical help with his problems. Are you telling us that hes more capable of changing for the better than you are willing to try ? That'll tell everyone just who bailed on the work to rebuild this marriage...

I think you are an amazing person! I will diagnose your hubbi with Bipolar Disease. My father is a Bipolar and all they want is attention and Love. Make sure he takes his meds. Everything should be ok. God Bless you!

continue with what your doing UNTILL such a time you feel its right 100% to be with him or to go your seperate ways.............only time will tell...................and i dont think its the right time for you now considing what you have said here.