Celeste

for a long time, a really long time i'v wanted to run away from home. i know it's not right but im afraid if that im going to. also i feel like i need to be tied up, i know it might sound strange but i think if im not im going to run. also im suicidal so i might act on that as well.

im seeing a psychologist but i cant tell him i just cant, also when i see him i cant talk to him properly because my parents are always in the room which makes me extremely uncomfortable. also i feel uncomfortable talking to my parents about these things, extremely uncomfortable!!

im also starting to drift away from my parents i don't want to be with them, and i dont want them to love or care about me.

Ok I'm 13 I just came back from school camp ( 5 days ) and I getting so so scared and worried I haven't been able to go to the toilet for about 6 days or more I can pee fine but can't seem to do the other I was fine before I had gone to camp, so I thought maybe it was the food at camp I don't know ( I wasn't eating hugely at camp their food was a bit funny ) I'm so worried and scared over the period I was at camp I'v woken up at night and felt sick in the stomach and felt the need to poop but when I'd gone to the toilet nothing. I'm straining and nothing is happening, I feel really really fool to but I figure that's because I can't get the food I'v eaten out. PLEASE HELP I CAN'T STOP CRYING

Can anyone give me something that will make me poop even if it upsets my tummy so it's ( diarrhoea )

Lastly PLEASE ANSWER: Will I die??

Ok I'm 13 I just came back from school camp ( 5 days ) and I getting so so scared and worried I haven't been able to go to the toilet for about 6 days or more I can pee fine but can't seem to do the other I was fine before I had gone to camp, so I thought maybe it was the food at camp I don't know ( I wasn't eating hugely at camp their food was a bit funny ) I'm so worried and scared over the period I was at camp I'v woken up at night and felt sick in the stomach and felt the need to poop but when I'd gone to the toilet nothing. I'm straining and nothing is happening, I feel really really fool to but I figure that's because I can't get the food I'v eaten out. PLEASE HELP I CAN'T STOP CRYING

Can anyone give me something that will make me poop even if it upsets my tummy so it's ( diarrhoea )

Lastly PLEASE ANSWER: Will I die??

I was told I had clinical depression.

How bad is it compared to other forms of depression?

What does it mean?

Am I the only one who doesn't want to stop?

About a month ago I was found out for cutting ( up and down my arm ) I'm seeing doctors and a psychologist and hadn't cut for about 2 weeks, but the urge was just so big I had to cut again this time its on my leg, there's a chaplain At school he's fairly young and said I could talk to him any time and he'll listen I want to tell him but I don't want him to tell anyone.

I'm just Lost at the moment everything is mixed up.

I just got found out for self harming ( cutting ) and now I have to go to a psychiatrist, what will she/he ask me?

Today was a long day basically my parents and teachers found out I self harm, is it ment to be a relief?

I feel stupid and guilty and I just want to dig a hole and burry myself forever I feel like no one understands. They think that I'm doing it for a fashion I don't think they get that I'm doing it because I'm angry sad and empty?

What do I do?

Today was a long day basically my parents and teachers found out I self harm, is it ment to be a relief?

I feel stupid and guilty and I just want to dig a hole and burry myself forever I feel like no one understands. They think that I'm doing it for a fashion I don't think they get that I'm doing it because I'm angry sad and empty?

What do I do?

I don't know If I should get help, but for the last few months on the odd occasion I might hear or see something which I know isnt real.

I heard a voice call my name in bed once no one was in the room with me the voice was unlike anything I'v ever heard.

Today I was about to open the bathroom door ( exiting ) and I heard a few knockes on the door I opened it strait away no one was there. another night I swear I saw little glowing red fairys outside my window.

Again do I need help?

I want to loose a bit more weight not much but just a little I way 100 pounds at the moment and I can't seem to loose any weight. First of all I usually only have tea for breakfast and skip lunch but then I have dinner. I do this almost every day.

Also one more thing it's gotten a little little bit better but basically I can't eat in front of people I just can't not shook mates or anything and I definitely can't eat in front of teachers. The only people and I mean only people I can eat with is my family ( mum dad and my twin and little sister ).

When I go out my dad occasionally buys me something to eat so I go sit at a table in the food court with my food but my dad goes off for a little bit so he can get himself meal, I can't eat until he gets back to me and is eating at the same time and he has to sit in front of me so I'm not facing anyone opposite me. I also have to cover my mouth when I eat every bite when I chew I have to cover my mouth until I'm done. This makes my refuse food that I sometimes want to eat like if someone offers me a lolly or garlic bread or chips etc I just cant accept it.

I'm sorry this was so long.

I appreciate it :]

If someone admit to you they self harmed what would your reaction be?

Is this normal? Do alot of people have suicidal thoughts. Also I had them when I was 12 aswell and I'm also a self hamer with no help.

I self harm ( cutting ) should I get help even if I don't cut super deep ( I cut deep enough to draw blood )

I haven't told any adults about my self harm I started about 1 month ago and i think its already a problem, I want to tell an adult but I'm just wondering If telling a teacher or principal at school is a good Idea ( I'm not really close to any of the teachers though )

Please don't tell me to tell my parents because I can't at the moment.

Oh and I can't see a councillor at the moment.

One more thing Im pretty sure the teachers haven't delt with self harm before ( maybe once I don't know ) im still only in primary.

Look, I'm so so close to telling an adult about my self harm and struggles but the only thing that's really holding me back is what their reaction is going to be. I want help but I don't want to freak them out.

Can anyone help?

It's about a possible depression, not knowing what to do and cutting.

I don't want to let her know why because she will give me a hard time and I won't want to get help anymore. Also my mum just keeps asking and I like a little privacy.

I'v always wanted someone, just anyone that I could trust and tell things to. Out of the friends I have at school none of them would understand my situation and my feelings. I can't tell them anything ( I'v been with some for 4 years and I still can't ) u can't tell my parents or my twin. I'm so distant to my family although they can't see it. No one seems to see my troubles and yet I know their there. I cut I'v had suicidal thoughts and often cry myself to sleep. Am I just imagining these things or is everyone around me just blind? I can't go get help from a counsilor or a doctor because me, I'm a coward and I can't see myself doing that and it's not like I have anyone to support me or bring me to someone. What do I do? I'm dying on the inside and smiling on the outside.