~A Musician's Dream~

So my ex and I have been talking for a few weeks. I'm 24, he's 26. We dated for 3.5 years back during our undergrad studies and broke up in 2013. It was a pretty bad break up that we had, involving me moving out of his apartment. We have discussed the past and decided to put it behind us. We now understood that our relationship had terrible communication as well as that we both were immature and naive. He still had the "gotta party" mindset while I was more of a home body. We both have done some growing up and we want to take things slow and consider getting back together. I've been thinking about meeting with him and I think we may end up back together. Please don't tell me that I should just move on to the next guy and blah blah blah. I truly would like some advice as to how I should break the news to my parents, who I've been living with while I get my last college degree. They were there for me when I came home depressed. I wouldn't know how to tell them that me and my ex have been talking nor would I know how they would take the news, expecially my dad. So...what's a good way to break the news if we get back together.

I received some text messages that were very lewd and inappropriate. There were also sexually explicit pictures that was sent as well. I do not know who was sending me these messages. I told him that he had the wrong number, asked who he was (in case it was someone I knew playing a prank on me), and asked who they think they were talking to. I then told him to stop messaging me and I never responded after that but he continued to keep sending me messages and pictures of his private parts. He apologized and said he was sorry but continued to text me and asked me who I was for almost an hour. I never responded and the messages stopped. I'm not sure if this guy was intoxicated or it's a really sick joke because I have never seen this guy nor do I know how he received my number. There was a text that said he was hammered but I can't be sure if it was a prank. Is this considered sexual harassment if I told the guy to leave me alone but he continued to sext me? My roommate and her cousin thought it was hilarious that this happened to me and was trying to get me to respond to this guy but I don't think it's funny to receive messages like this from someone I have never met in my life. What should I do?

I received some text messages that were very lewd and inappropriate. There were also sexually explicit pictures that was sent as well. I do not know who was sending me these messages. I told him that he had the wrong number, asked who he was (in case it was someone I knew playing a prank on me), and asked who they think they were talking to. I then told him to stop messaging me and I never responded after that but he continued to keep sending me messages and pictures of his private parts. He apologized and said he was sorry but continued to text me and asked me who I was for almost an hour. I never responded and the messages stopped. I'm not sure if this guy was intoxicated or it's a really sick joke because I have never seen this guy nor do I know how he received my number. There was a text that said he was hammered but I can't be sure if it was a prank. Is this considered sexual harassment if I told the guy to leave me alone but he continued to sext me? My roommate and her cousin thought it was hilarious that this happened to me and was trying to get me to respond to this guy but I don't think it's funny to receive messages like this from someone I have never met in my life. What should I do?

I'm going to try and give you the shorthand version (emphasis on TRY). There are 4 of us that live in a 4/4 in Florida. One of them, *Amy (names have been changed) is very inconsiderate and the other 2 and I have decided that we don't want her to live with us anymore, but we can't force her to move out because we are all on individual leases. So, here is why we are fed up: She's not that clean. She will use our things and either not wash them thoroughly or not at all. She used to leave dishes wherever she was sitting and it would stay there all night. We have now taken all of our things (the good utensils) into our rooms and out of her hands. She left pizza sitting out on the counter in the boxes for almost 3 days and we put it next to her door (which is completely isolated from the common room unlike the rest of us). She threw it away, but tried to get back by putting *Maria's steamer full of water on the floor by her door. She forgot to empty the water out. Her door is right next to the kitchen and had I not found it, she could have slipped and hit her head on the counter. Amy blends smoothies in the morning before everyone is up, shocking us out of our sleep and when we confronted her, asking her to either blend at a later time, do it at night or in her room, she snapped and yelled at us saying that it's reasonable to blend at 8 AM or earlier. Now she's being passive-aggressive because we have basically isolated her from our things even though she is to blame for not being considerate of the other three people in the apartment. I've had enough and it is actually taking a toll on my health. Along with school and a recital that I have coming up, concerts, performances, midterms...I had an anxiety attack the other day at the bus stop because everything is just too much for me. I'm wondering if this is a good reason to have her kicked out. If not, transferred out of the apartment to another room. We can't deal with her anymore. She can't take criticism and any attempts to be civil ends with her lashing out. We had a meeting and basically said that EVERYONE needed to clean up behind themselves and be considerate when using other people's things. We never came at her directly and she lashed out at Maria. *Alex was trying to be the mediator, but soon got the brunt of Amy's aggressive nature.

Is there anyway that the property manager or leasing manager can remove her from the apartment because it is cause undue stress to my health? I don't know if I can take anymore stuff. I can't relax at school, nor in my own apartment. I have no place to go. I'm 10-12 hours away from home. Please, someone help me.

I met this guy online and I would like to finally meet him or get his number so we can at least talk on the phone. I'm in Gainesville for school and he lives in Jacksonville, roughly an hour and a half from me. Unfortunately my truck is in Tennessee with my parents getting work done on it, but I like him and I would like to meet him. How do I go about asking him out or for him number? We have communicated for a little bit online, but he's been busy with work and school. I messaged him on new year's and he hasn't answered yet and he hasn't been back on the site in almost a week. I sent him a message today saying that I haven't heard from him in a while and was hoping everything was going ok in his life. What should I do?

Thanks,

Musician's Dream

My ex fiance broke up with me about a month ago. He entered a new relationship with this girl who is a music major at our college. We had been together for 3.5 years and engaged for 4 months. He started telling me that he had been unhappy for like a year or so and that the relationship was becoming a burden, that he was tired. I had been the model girlfriend, always faithful and there when he needed me. When we broke up, he kicked me out of the apartment at 3 in the morning not caring that I didn't have no place to go but luckily I had a sorority sister that took me in so early in the morning. I was there when he was in and out the hospital for his asthma, I let him use my truck when he needed to run somewhere, I helped him get his asthma medicine when he needed it, etc. He was my first in everything. He had been talking to this new girl before we broke up. A friend told me that over the summer when I went home from college, he tried to take advantage of other mutual friend when she got drunk and that he did something with a guy. She also told me he had a wandering eye when we initially got together my freshman year.

long story short, word of all of this got back to his grandparents. I did tell his mother about our break up because her son threw me out saying, "get your **** and get out!" His grandfather dislikes him, saying a man should not treat a woman like that and now they aren't coming to his (and my) graduation. He said that they have been am important role in his collegiate career and that what happened between us should have stayed between us and that I shouldn't be going around telling people what he did because they are only getting my side of the story and not what I did that night that led up to me being put out. I told everyone who asked exactly what I did for him to throw me out, including his mother. He's putting the blame of his grandparents not coming on me, he put the hives he has been getting out of stress on me, and he has been talking about me negatively to this new girl and she's talking right back. But he said now he's being looked down and talked down to in the music building because of what I said but there are people who were taken advantaged of by him and those who are eyewitnesses telling me things and talking themselves. He insulted me today in front of our fellow honor students at our college's honor convocation. Then did so to this new girl. My mentoring teacher for my internship told me that I shouldn't keep things to myself, that i did have to tell because he is trying to control things. I had wished that all those times when I had found things on his phone or saw things that I has listened to my intuition and left. Now I have just remembered that one night, I had gotten super drunk because I was upset about work and my internship. When we went to be, he had sex with me. I can't remember if I said no or not but afterwards I was confused as to if I was taken advantaged of since I have given myself to him before.

Did he take advantage of me that night? Was I raped? was this an abusive relationship? I'm so confused about things. People are saying it is an abusive relationship, but you all are the first to hear about the night I was drunk. Please help.

My boyfriend (well fiancé cause he did propose) broke up with me a week and a half ago. I want to get him back because I know where we went wrong. We were together for 3 1/2 years and we let outside influences and every day life keep us from attending to each other's needs. He stopped doing things and I did the same. He said he was tired of the relationship. That it was a burden to him. He has other things going on like finding money for school and dealing with his internship and work. I've been stressed out too with my internship and job as well and it's made me so tired lately. The break wasn't good but it wasn't bad either. I did the basic things when you're losing someone you love, cry, beg, plead...then get mad and say and do things blah blah blah. And he told me to leave the apartment early in the morning but this was after I told him I had found another place to stay. I haven't talked to him since that night last week and I want to make amends and try and start a new relationship since the old one is over. The sad thing is I knew where I went wrong and I had bought lingerie and stuff so I could reignite his interest in me before he told me it was over and he won't respond. I've only sent like "hey" and "hi" text messages. What can I send to him that will have him responding? I want to invite him over to my new place so we could hang out and I can possibly show him that I've changed and that I had took his words to heart that day he told me what he wanted before he broke things off. What should I do?

My boyfriend (well fiancé cause he did propose) broke up with me a week and a half ago. I want to get him back because I know where we went wrong. We were together for 3 1/2 years and we let outside influences and every day life keep us from attending to each other's needs. He stopped doing things and I did the same. He said he was tired of the relationship. That it was a burden to him. He has other things going on like finding money for school and dealing with his internship and work. I've been stressed out too with my internship and job as well and it's made me so tired lately. The break wasn't good but it wasn't bad either. I did the basic things when you're losing someone you love, cry, beg, plead...then get mad and say and do things blah blah blah. And he told me to leave the apartment early in the morning but this was after I told him I had found another place to stay. I haven't talked to him since that night last week and I want to make amends and try and start a new relationship since the old one is over. The sad thing is I knew where I went wrong and I had bought lingerie and stuff so I could reignite his interest in me before he told me it was over and he won't respond. I've only sent like "hey" and "hi" text messages. What can I send to him that will have him responding? I want to invite him over to my new place so we could hang out and I can possibly show him that I've changed and that I had took his words to heart that day he told me what he wanted before he broke things off. What should I do?

My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years said he wanted a break and then turned around and said that he didn't want to continue the relationship (we were engaged to be married). It took one week after saying he wanted a break for a while for him to change from when we get back together, to if, and then to we are not. I moved out of the apartment and haven't talked to him in a week (I tried texting him earlier). It's been pretty much a week and a half since he made up his mind. I want to get him back because I realize where we went wrong. I wasn't giving him the attention that he needed which in turn made him not give me the attention that I needed. I believe that our relationship can be saved but I can't change his mind at this moment. The sad thing is that during that week when he changed his mind about our relationship I went out and bought some lingerie and shoes that I knew he would like. I wanted to put the flame back in our relationship but when he changed his mind, I wasn't able to. So should I tell him about it? Text him something like: "Funny thing. During that week of the break, I went out and bought all these pairs of undies that you would like and these heels, too. When I was saying (insert argument here) I was planning on doing this." That's what I was thinking of saying. Should I like make small talk before I do it or what? I want my baby back. He was really good to me and we were on our way to being married as soon as graduation for us was over come this May. Can someone give me some advice? We had a really good relationship besides that we both just got so into every day life, that we got too comfortable and we never came together to work things out. We didn't have a foundation for good communication. Our break wasn't good but it wasn't bad I should say. I did the basic things that most girls do, beg and plead. Cry and get mad. Said and did things, blah blah blah. He got mad and told me to leave early in the morning but this was after he knew I was moving out so he knew I had a place to go but he was mad, I was mad, and we do things when we are mad. I want to make amends and reignite our relationship to make it better. Some advice?

My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years said he wanted a break and then turned around and said that he didn't want to continue the relationship (we were engaged to be married). It took one week after saying he wanted a break for a while for him to change from when we get back together, to if, and then to we are not. I moved out of the apartment and haven't talked to him in a week (I tried texting him earlier). It's been pretty much a week and a half since he made up his mind. I want to get him back because I realize where we went wrong. I wasn't giving him the attention that he needed which in turn made him not give me the attention that I needed. I believe that our relationship can be saved but I can't change his mind at this moment. The sad thing is that during that week when he changed his mind about our relationship I went out and bought some lingerie and shoes that I knew he would like. I wanted to put the flame back in our relationship but when he changed his mind, I wasn't able to. So should I tell him about it? Text him something like: "Funny thing. During that week of the break, I went out and bought all these pairs of undies that you would like and these heels, too. When I was saying (insert argument here) I was planning on doing this." That's what I was thinking of saying. Should I like make small talk before I do it or what? I want my baby back. He was really good to me and we were on our way to being married as soon as graduation for us was over come this May. Can someone give me some advice? We had a really good relationship besides that we both just got so into every day life, that we got too comfortable and we never came together to work things out. We didn't have a foundation for good communication. Our break wasn't good but it wasn't bad I should say. I did the basic things that most girls do, beg and plead. Cry and get mad. Said and did things, blah blah blah. He got mad and told me to leave early in the morning but this was after he knew I was moving out so he knew I had a place to go but he was mad, I was mad, and we do things when we are mad. I want to make amends and reignite our relationship to make it better. Some advice?

I've recently started taking the birth control pill, Tri-Sprintec on July 15th and I have been having problems with it since. It's my first time taking BC and I've been really sick on this brand. I was ok the Sunday I started taking them. Then on Monday, I had no appetite. I was travelling from home back to school and all I had that day was 2 hashbrowns from McDonald's, a bag of cheeze-its, and 3 or 4 bites of rotel dip. I took the pill at 12 noon and around 9 or 10 that night, I threw up twice. I was ok Tuesday through Thursday, but I was nauseated all weekend and went to the store to buy Pepto-Bismal and some Pedialyte freezer pops. I went to the pharmicist at CVS and she say that if it's to the point where I need pepto and pedialyte that I may need to switch BC because the dosage is to strong for me. My doctor told me that it's normal to feel this way because your body isn't used to all the hormones and to try taking the pill at night before bed to ease the symtoms. So yesterday, instead of taking the pill at noon, I waited until around 11:30 that night (I was originally gonna take it at 9 PM but there was no food at the house until 11:30). During my wait, I had small pain twinges in my body and I felt anxious and wired up. After I took it, I had a massive headache but it dissipated after an hour. I feel a little better this morning, but I'm nauseous a little bit, but at the same time hungry with no appetite.

Should I switch birth control pills as soon as this pack is done? If so, which brand will be a good one to go to? I looked up Seasonique and Ori tri-cylen (the brand name of tri-sprintec). Would it be better for me to do a 91-Day pack instead of a 21- or 28-Day pack?

Thank you,

~Dream

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. I love him with all my heart, but I really wish he would stop smoking. When I say smoking, I mean all: cigarettes, cigarillos, blacks, weed, cigars, etc. He's an asthmatic. He knows he should not be smoking anything because of his condition and he lies about smoking when he goes to the doctor, claiming he doesn't do it enough to be a problem, but you should tell your doctor everything no matter how often you do it. His asthma was really bad last year to where he had an exacerbation and had to be hospitalized for a couple of days. I can't stand smoke cause I literally get sick around it. My sinuses act up, I get a sore throat, and nausea. I like to say I'm allergic to it.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend came into town and he decided to go smoke some weed with her and all his other friends, leaving me behind cause he knows I don't like him smoking. That was a breaking point so I packed my things from his apartment and moved back on campus for the rest of that week (I stay with him but I have a dorm on campus that my scholarship pays for that I go to when he's working). What made it worse was that he knew that I was upset and did nothing about it cause he said he's tired of my attitudes and trying to make me feel better so I was brooding all that week and he was acting as if I were just another gal friend to him, saying I overreacted about his smoking. We somewhat reconciled that, he promised not to smoke, and we were back on good terms until the proclaimed "4/20" day where everyone smokes weed on Bob Marley's birthday. We were celebrating a friend's birthday and as soon as he walked into the door, he grabbed a blunt and a black and that was that. I was pissed off for the rest of that time. He then said that he was sorry but he shouldn't of made that promise cause he knew he wouldn't keep it, asking how long I was gone be mad, and then asked if I wanted to go back on campus...like my feelings didn't matter. Then had the audacity to go out late and smoke some more, leaving me stuck on campus. I had the truck, but he got the key to his apartment and I needed my stuff cause I had a performance in the morning. I blew his phone up until it died (felt like he was ignoring me, could have been an emergency), then resolved to just pick my stuck up in the morning until he texted me at 2 AM saying he home. He completely doesn't care about me enough to stop smoking. He's finally gotten what he wanted from me, more intimacy, but I can't be intimate with an ash tray that's high. Every time there's a get together no matter how small or big it is, someone's there with weed and a black, and he's gunning for both...but he has the gall to tell me that he's trying to stop, but the first then you do when coming in is ignore me and then go smoke (that's what he did at the birthday party).

What should I do? I'm tired of this argument. If we're going to live together, I don't want it in the house, but he doesn't see it my way.

Today, one of our friends was like all over my boyfriend/fiance. She sits with us for lunch and dinner and my BF was sitting at another table because he was studying for a midterm with his classmates. He was about to leave for his 5:30 class and he came over to say hi and bye to everyone. Now, she (lets call her Jay) wasn't doing nothing but being on her phone until he came over and she just popped up and got all up in his face, but its that playful getting in someone face where you just teasing him, but instead of being like arms' length away, she was literally pressed up against him and it wasn't helping that our other friend DJ was behind him cause that kinda sandwiched my BF between them. And I was like WTF? He saw the look on my face and was trying to get away from him but as he was backing away, she kept following him and trying to be all over him. He was pushing her away while he was backing out the cafe with one arm extended all the way out to keep her away.

I get playful with my guy friends, but at the same time, I show them, myself, and my BF respect by keeping my body off of them cause how would that look if I was pressed up against some dude who ain't my baby? Same goes for my "friends" who wanna do this with my bay...they need to keep out of his (my) personal space.

Am I tripping or did she overstep the boundaries by doing this?

Today, one of our friends was like all over my boyfriend/fiance. She sits with us for lunch and dinner and my BF was sitting at another table because he was studying for a midterm with his classmates. He was about to leave for his 5:30 class and he came over to say hi and bye to everyone. Now, she (lets call her Jay) wasn't doing nothing but being on her phone until he came over and she just popped up and got all up in his face, but its that playful getting in someone face where you just teasing him, but instead of being like arms' length away, she was literally pressed up against him and it wasn't helping that our other friend DJ was behind him cause that kinda sandwiched my BF between them. And I was like WTF? He saw the look on my face and was trying to get away from him but as he was backing away, she kept following him and trying to be all over him. He was pushing her away while he was backing out the cafe with one arm extended all the way out to keep her away.

I get playful with my guy friends, but at the same time, I show them, myself, and my BF respect by keeping my body off of them cause how would that look if I was pressed up against some dude who ain't my baby? Same goes for my "friends" who wanna do this with my bay...they need to keep out of his (my) personal space.

Am I tripping or did she overstep the boundaries by doing this?

My bf and I had two arguments. The first was sunday. We went to the movies with a bunch of friends but the problem was transportation. One of our other friends dropped them off but they didn't have no other ride back. So I was like how they gonna get back on campus and he was like they gonna lap up in the back seat. I have a Honda CR-V. Even though it's an SUV, it's akin to a small sedan. So I was like we're going to stuff five people into the back of my truck when it can barely seat three comfortably? We started arguing, him about how they our friends (I didn't even know one of them and barely two of the others) and they don't have a ride and what if I were in their situation. Come to find out AFTER we had piled everyone in that one was claustrophobic and she basically went into shock before we even left the mall. I stormed out the vehicle and then later he going say I was terrible and that I had no reason to act that way. That they look to me as a friend and how would that make me look telling two of them to find another ride even though I said I would wait for them to find one. I was doing what my daddy told me to do and not have a lot of people in my truck but he was like what kind of friend would I be to leave them there. He really hurt me and I cried myself to sleep. The other argument is about one of his gal pals he's been hanging with. I don't like her. They all chummy and what not. Talking low when I'm around. IDK about what cause I had my music blasting. He said I embarrased him with how I've been acting and that there's no conspiracy-theory thing and it hurts him that I would say that. I never said he was flirting or anything, accidently implied, but never said it. I just don't like her. Call it my gut, or a bad feeling, or woman's intuition but I don't like her. PERIOD. And I feel he hasn't listened to me at all, before, during, and after the arguments. He said he's disappointed in me because of the way I've been acting and that I need to grow up.

Is he right? Am I right? Or are we both right or wrong?

My bf and I had two arguments. The first was sunday. We went to the movies with a bunch of friends but the problem was transportation. One of our other friends dropped them off but they didn't have no other ride back. So I was like how they gonna get back on campus and he was like they gonna lap up in the back seat. I have a Honda CR-V. Even though it's an SUV, it's akin to a small sedan. So I was like we're going to stuff five people into the back of my truck when it can barely seat three comfortably? We started arguing, him about how they our friends (I didn't even know one of them and barely two of the others) and they don't have a ride and what if I were in their situation. Come to find out AFTER we had piled everyone in that one was claustrophobic and she basically went into shock before we even left the mall. I stormed out the vehicle and then later he going say I was terrible and that I had no reason to act that way. That they look to me as a friend and how would that make me look telling two of them to find another ride even though I said I would wait for them to find one. I was doing what my daddy told me to do and not have a lot of people in my truck but he was like what kind of friend would I be to leave them there. He really hurt me and I cried myself to sleep. The other argument is about one of his gal pals he's been hanging with. I don't like her. They all chummy and what not. Talking low when I'm around. IDK about what cause I had my music blasting. He said I embarrased him with how I've been acting and that there's no conspiracy-theory thing and it hurts him that I would say that. I never said he was flirting or anything, accidently implied, but never said it. I just don't like her. Call it my gut, or a bad feeling, or woman's intuition but I don't like her. PERIOD. And I feel he hasn't listened to me at all, before, during, and after the arguments. He said he's disappointed in me because of the way I've been acting and that I need to grow up.

Is he right? Am I right? Or are we both right or wrong?

My boyfriend of almost two years told me that I'm afraid of intimacy. He said he don't know how I think a relationship will last without any intimacy, so I can run from it all I want and that he's here for me always and forever. This all started last night. We were watching a movie and he wanted us to be intimate after the movie. I said i was going to rest up and ended up going to sleep. He got mad cause for a month we haven't spent anytime together because of school, his job, and our practicing for competitions and such. We stayed up till almost 6:00 in the morning saturday waiting for one of the roommates to go to sleep so we could have some alone time. Add that and I was due for about 12 straight hours of sleep.

I said I wanted to stay up but was too tired. But he said if I really wanted to, I would of did it anyway regardless of it and then told me to put myself in his shoes. I would have been mad for a little while, but I would be happy just to be with him in any shape or form. He saying I'm afraid of intimacy. But he's hurt me twice in about 5 months. I found texts on his phone twice that were inappropriate. The first time was to one of his exes, "reliving" the past with each other about very intimate stuff. The second time was to one of my friends that had crossed the band with me, asking him if he could go down on them. And that was two weeks ago. I found out about two months ago that he used to be bicurious. All of this stuff coming to the surface has made me wary of getting close to him again. Cause this hurts me and it makes me not wanna open up no more, not as easily as it was before.I came to him pure as heaven. No past, no exes, no curiousity, no emotional issues, nothing. It took me a whole year to fully open up to him and then his past came back twice and caused me to close up. Am I now afraid of intimacy because of his past and what he's done recently?

We ain't pregnant yet, but me and my man are planning for future references after we both graduate college and get married...That's when we'll start thinking about kids, but right now we're just gathering our bearings...Trust me, I ain't planning on getting pregnant. Not for a while and I'm making sure of that...

What middle name goes with Aurther Kimmons?

We were thinking William but that's his dad's middle name. My boyfriend is the third after his father and grandfather and they all have different middle names. Since they all don't have the same name, I want to keep that tradition. So what will be a good middle name for it?

Also, for a girl, we were thinking Abigail Marie and just in case we have another boy, Samuel Eli...what do you think?

Please and Thank You!!!

~The Musician's Dream~

My boyfriend and I are planning on getting married sometime after we graduate college. So we won't have a lot to worry about, in my spare time I'm planning out our wedding. We've already decided on the colors which will be blue and white. I've been looking for a dress. I want one with color in it, but I'll settle for one without. I found a few and I want to know your opinion of them and which will flatter my figure best.

I'm 5'6", 120 pounds. I have an almost hourglass figure with my chest being slightly bigger at about 34C.

For first two dresses, go to color tab and click Cobalt

1.) http://www.alfredangelo.com/Collections/ProductDis...

2.) http://www.alfredangelo.com/Collections/ProductDis...

3.) http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/serv...

4.) (click Horizon in colors): http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/serv...

5.) http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/serv...

And would this make a good reception dress if I were to change afterwards?

http://www.amazon.com/Goddess-Strapless-Satin-Holi...

Please and thank you! :-)

So me and my boyfriend had a heart to heart last night that resulted in both of is in tears. Basically, I've only been giving part of myself to him cause I refuse to show my true self with him. I realized that and now I'm trying to convince myself that it doesn't matter what I think but us as a whole. I'm afraid to do that cause I'm afraid that he would leave me one day. But after last night it's not an option. So any tips on how to just be myself?